Orange Jesus and the $60 Bible

Let’s talk about Donald Trump’s latest grift: his ridiculously expensive $60 bible that he’s selling…during Holy Week…in a partnership with country music star Lee Greenwood…he of “I’m Proud to be an American” fame.

Let’s set the record straight: Trump is a hypocrite with giant heathen balls. He’s a fake-ass Christian who never met a sin he didn’t love to commit. That he’s vomiting about faith, religion and God would be as laughable and hypocritical as Jeffrey Dahmer warning about the health risks of cannibalism.

Trump, better known as Orange Jesus to evangelicals who’ve anointed him The Chosen One, is desperately trying to appeal to a much broader swath of Christian-folk as the November election looms large. He’s like a dying atheist suddenly finding God.

But let’s relish for a moment the delicious irony of Trump’s latest scam. He wants Christians…ya know, people of faith…to buy his Good Book so he can raise money to pay off his judgements and legal expenses for being a corrupt fraud who cheated on every one of his wives, fucked porn stars and strippers and most likely underage girls, bragged out grabbing pussies, and who sexually assaulted and raped many women. Oh yeah, that’s some straight-outta-the-Bible shit right there!

Now back to Greenwood. Let’s take a moment to review the first chorus of his cheesy anthem…